A satirical look at Griffith’s habits on the road ...
Car parks are for parking
Drivers on Banna Avenue must stop using the median strip as a turn-around bay.
Just a couple of days ago, as I cycled down the main street, I was very nearly collected by a Commodore driver, who chose to cut across some of the empty car parks in the middle of the street rather than driving the extra hundred or so metres to the designated U-turn area provided.
This is an unsafe practice and needs to stop.
One’s visibility is reduced by surrounding parked cars when performing these illegal turns, not to mention the speed, at which some drivers are racing around, is excessive.
Is the couple of seconds you save on your trip between the ATM and your drug dealer’s house really worth the cost of killing a poor defenceless cyclist?
– U. Turner, Griffith.
Nonna’s none the wiser, luckily
In response to U. Turner’s letter regarding unsafe driving - don’t even get me started on you and your band of mates tearing down the main street at a hundred miles an hour on your deadly treadlies.
How about slowing down for, and possibly even giving way to, pedestrians at pedestrian crossings.
My poor old Nonna was attempting to cross the road (she’s not as spritely as she once was), when one of these impatient MAMILs (clearly fantasising about recreating Cadel Evans’ historic feat in le 2011 Tour de France) failed to give way and rocketed straight through the crossing, sideswiping her.
The impact caused Nonna to be spun 180 degrees and, in the confusion, she walked straight back into the library.
I received a call from Nonna’s pharmacist hours later who was concerned as to why she had not returned for her arthritis prescription.
I went home to check on her, however Nonno said she still was not back from the shops.
Unsure of Nonna’s whereabouts, I enquired at the Exies and the Gem Room with no success. I later found Nonna, still at the library, gazing at a popular E.L. James novel, still in shock, presumably from the cyclist incident.
Luckily, apart from a couple of scratches on her walking frame, she was uninjured.
Unless these maniacs pull their heads in, the next person might not be as lucky.
– A. Costa, Yoogali.
More Driven up the Wall at areanews.com.au next Wednesday.
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