THIS week a question was submitted anonymously: “I recently read your article on surrender. I know that’s what I need to do but I’m struggling with people expecting more and more from me. Some advice would really help.”
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Today’s card “Burdens” courtesy of Colette Baron-Reid is about contemplating the nature of the burdens we carry.
The key message is that it’s “time to leave behind any unnecessary burdens and to know you have the strength to carry what’s yours.”
But to get to that realisation we must first acknowledge what we consider our burdens to be.
There’s no shortage of potential burdens these days. People and events constantly require our attention. We deal with one and then before we can catch our breath, there’s another, and another.
Helping others, doing for others often comes second nature. Mothers are quick to partake in this behaviour. Admirable? Sure. Exhausting? Most definitely!
Many self-help books advise to lay down your burdens. Maybe it’s not a case of where you lay them down but to whom? Delegation springs to mind. What “burdens” have you taken upon yourself that actually belong to someone else?
It might be as minor as picking up after someone or as major as caring for an elderly parent. In her bestseller, The Yo-Yo Diet Syndrome, Doreen Virtue makes connections between weight and behaviour (but that’s a whole other column!). For today, her sentiment about burdens is direct but also empowering. “All pressure and stress is self-imposed. We decide on our stress levels through our mental outlook, by saying yes when we want to say no, and by making decisions about our jobs, relationships, and other life areas out of guilt and fear – instead of out of love. Fortunately, if we don’t like the results of our past choices, we can choose again.”
Tips on how to not become a beast of burden:
- Identify your major tasks and responsibilities. Writing them down will help to see the breadth of your burdens.
- Review your list – are you doing more than your fair share? Are there things that aren’t really necessary?
- Delegate or delete anything that’s crept onto your plate that isn’t yours or is no longer meaningful to you.
Think of this as an exercise in evaluating your whole life.
I suspect it represents a bigger transformation than you might be aware of.
A caterpillar might look at its cocoon as a restriction, the contents of the pupa might look like an oozy mess but as we all know after this radical transformation emerges a butterfly.
Send your questions for Sharon to editor@areanews.com.au
